The theme for this Children’s Mental Health Week is ‘Growing Together’. Recovery following traumatic injury will involve interventions that support a child physically and psychologically, but their rehabilitation also needs to take into consideration the changing needs of that child as they grow and develop.
HCML Clinical Operations Manager Samantha Hadley shares some advice on supporting young people with their mental health following trauma.
Everyone will experience sad and upsetting times in their life, and it’s normal to feel sad or low as a result of that. When difficult things happen, with support, the young person will feel better in time. Sometimes though events can be traumatic and can leave the young person struggling with their mental health. In this situation it’s important to note that a parent or carer can be a really important part of the help and support that they need. As a parent/carer you can provide essential emotional support and a loving, safe relationship, and environment. By being there for them – and finding the right professional help for them if needed – you can make an enormous difference.
‘Trauma’ is a word used to describe both one off events and things that are experienced over months or years. A traumatic event often involves a threat to a young person’s physical or emotional safety and a sense of being trapped, powerless in the face of a real or perceived danger, or in the time afterwards.
Spotting the signs of mental health problems in young people
Every child will respond differently to trauma so it’s not always easy to spot the signs. The child may show they are struggling immediately after a traumatic experience, however, it’s important to note that feelings, thoughts and behaviours may also emerge over time. They may have memories, thoughts or flashbacks that seem to come suddenly from nowhere. These are often called ‘intrusive’ thoughts. They may display angry outbursts and find it difficult to calm down when they’re distressed. You may notice that they start withdrawing from friends, family, school, and activities they usually enjoy. They may start repeating certain behaviours or seem agitated. They may avoid thinking about, talking about or being in situations which are related to a particular experience. They could seem sensitive or vigilant about anything that could be threatening, or seem zoned-out or disconnected from themselves, their feelings and what’s going on around them. They may have trouble remembering things, not feeling able to sleep or having nightmares. There may be use of drugs or alcohol involved and evidence of self-harm. You might notice their eating habits change, perhaps eating significantly more or less. They may not be aware of what or why they are behaving in these ways, so you need to be aware of any changes in behaviour.
These behavioural responses are often a young person’s way of trying to manage and express difficult feelings. They may feel that some of these behaviours help them to survive or cope, make sense of what’s happened, or gives them a sense of safety and control. Underneath these kinds of behaviours, a young person who has experienced trauma may be feeling anxious, angry, frightened, unsafe, numb, low or depressed, isolated, guilty, ashamed or bad about themselves.
A wide variety of mental health conditions and symptoms can be linked to trauma including anxiety, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), eating disorders and self-harming behaviours. Some young people can also be diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD).
It’s normal for a young person to feel or behave differently after a distressing or traumatic event or experience. As a parent or caregiver, it’s important to give them time to process and adjust to what’s happened, while keeping an eye on how they’re doing and seeking further help if it’s needed.
What you can do to support young people’s mental health
Let them speak as often and for as long as they need to. Helping the child to make sense of what’s happened and how they’re feeling can make an enormous difference. It’s useful to reflect back the words they use when talking with them, and to not be afraid of using ‘big’ words such as terrified, horrified or furious. You might say, “It’s really understandable that you’re feeling frightened/angry/sad…” to let them know that you’ve got it, and that it’s okay to have these feelings.
A traumatic experience often involves feeling unsafe, frightened or out of control. Providing structure, routine, and reassurance that you can support them to manage things can help them re-establish a sense of safety. Let them know you’re there for them and you can help them find the right support if they need it.
If something that’s traumatic for the child is still happening, such as being bullied, it needs to be addressed so that it stops. Knowing what works and trusting that they can help themselves when things are hard will help to build the child’s belief in their ability to cope. Introducing or encouraging strategies such as running, drawing, listening to music, writing in a journal, talking to family or friends, watching a favourite film, or reading a favourite book can be really helpful. Doing these kinds of activities can give the child a break and help them to feel safe and relaxed, even if just for a little while. Some young people who have experienced trauma will need professional and specialist help to feel better. If you’re worried that your child is struggling, seek professional advice.
According to Young Minds, the young people’s mental health charity, young people say they want the adults that support them to know that everyone’s experience is different, and this trauma shouldn’t define who they are. They still want to be seen as a whole person and understand that their behaviour is not who they are but is a result of what they have been through.
Where can you go for support?
There are different places you can get help for the child. Their GP and the child’s school are good places to start. A GP may refer the young person to Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) for assessment and treatment.
Supporting a young person who has gone through some kind of trauma can be a very emotional experience, so take time to look after yourself and top up your own batteries. To support the child, you need to keep looking after yourself by talking to friends, family and anyone else in your support network, taking time out and asking for help when you need it.
If you feel that you need more support, you can ask for counselling or other support through your GP. You can also access a private counsellor or therapist if this is an affordable option for you.
Young Minds provide free, 24/7 text support for young people across the UK experiencing a mental health crisis. All texts are answered by trained volunteers, with support from experienced clinical supervisors. Text YM to 85258.
Place2Be runs Children’s Mental Health Week. They’re a charity that provides counselling and mental health support and training in UK schools. Support the charity by making a donation.